I’ve been thinking a lot about vows lately, mainly because my upcoming nuptials are just around the corner--less than six months away now!
Our wedding planning kind of took a back seat to house hunting recently, and despite having finally found a place, my fiancé Jim and I have still yet to really get back into the swing of planning for the big day. We got a lot of big things taken care of before the house hunt, but there are still some significant items to check off on our to-do list. Like finalizing the guest list, invitations, his tux, his groomsmen’s tuxes, someone to marry us, limo, hair, makeup, dress fittings, what we’re doing about vows, etc. I really don’t know what we’re going to do about vows. It seems that all I can do lately is watch HGTV and imagine redesigning our outdated bathroom and kitchen. I stare off into space and try to gauge whether or not we can lay laminate flooring in the basement ourselves, remove the wood paneled walls and put up sheet rock, or if we’ll need to call in a professional. I find my mind wandering, so lately I’ve started making other kinds of vows to myself, in hopes that I’ll make some strides and actually accomplish things of greater importance.
Vow: Contact Kleinfelds and set up your first dress fitting for the end of July. Technically I’m not supposed to have my fitting until August, but August is booking up quickly between my wedding and my friend Stephanie’s wedding in September--in which I’m a bridesmaid. And I don’t want to give myself anymore time to dilly dally, hem and haw and possibly not get myself into bridal shape until the last minute. So one of these days I need to set up this appointment so I can get into the full swing of things.
Vow: Lose 5 to 10 pounds before my first dress fitting. I don’t want to be one of those brides who is skinnier at her first fitting than she is at her third. Luckily my weight hasn’t fluctuated all that much over the past three years. But about four years ago I was at my heaviest, which is about 10 pounds heavier than I am right now. I don’t want that to happen again. I also have always dreamt of weighing closer to what I weighed in high school. The golden number, 127 lbs. Now, mind you, I’m 5’8”, so 127 I believe is actually a little under weight for my height. Full disclosure, right now I’m teetering between 135 and 140. Most days I weigh 137. If I could teeter between 130 and 135, rather than 135 and 140, I’d be a lot happier. I know it sounds small, but everyone has their wish. Everyone wants to look their very best on the day of their wedding, and this is the most realistic goal I can set for myself weight-wise. I don’t know if I’ll ever fit into my prom dress again, zipper fully zipped, breathing comfortably, but a girl can dream, can’t she?
Vow: I will not eat sweets for one week. Then, if I make it, I’ll go another week without sweets. I know, it sounds like a silly one. Or an easy one, depending on your sweet tooth. But when you’re around kids all day, as my current profession at 26-years-old with a Masters degree is that of babysitter, I’m constantly surrounded by delicious goodies and children who every five seconds want to know whether or not they can have dessert. I find myself popping chocolate covered pretzels and cookies left and right, wondering if I myself deserve dessert because I didn’t quite finish my lunch either. I’ve allowed myself to slip into this ugly snacking habit, and if I’m going to accomplish my previous vow, I’ll have to curb the sweets. Which brings me to my next vow.
Vow: No more chocolate cheerios. After this last box is finished, I vow not to buy another one. Okay, maybe one more. Do chocolate cheerios really count as “sweets?” I’m not eating them as a dessert. But maybe that’s even worse. I’m eating them as a whole entire meal. Amendment: I will not buy another box of chocolate cheerios, unless of course I stumble upon the new kind of peanut butter cheerios, and can mix them together, as Jim suggested, and see if they taste as delicious as Reese’s. I have a feeling they will be just as good if not better. You might argue that never knowing how delicious this combination is would be to my benefit because if I don’t know how good it is, how can I long for it? But believe me, until I try it, it will be all I’ll think about. The most frustrating part is that I used to be one of those people who could say, “no thanks,” to dessert or sweets when I was trying to avoid them, and not really care one way or the other. Every once in a while I’d indulge, but it didn’t become something I really craved until very recently. Maybe it’s the stress of house hunting and wedding planning at the same time. Maybe it’s because I’m constantly around little monsters who only ever want to eat chocolate. Maybe it’s because I’m depressed that my profession is babysitting when it should be something more substantial at this point, so I’m self-medicating by means of chocolate. Is there anything more soothing? Forget it. Vow: No more chocolate cheerios after this box. Good riddens.
Vow: Exercise, at minimum, four times a week. Back in November, I kick-started my new years resolution by buying an elliptical machine and literally exercising every single day. It’s been hard to keep up with that, so I’d alternate with ellipticalling and weights. Then I got sick of weights, so I’d just do the elliptical for longer each time I did it, and then I could sometimes skip a day here and there. Now, for some inexplicable reason, and this happens every Summer, I’m lucky if I work out two or three times a week. Does that even do anything? Is something really better than nothing? For some reason the closer I get to swimsuit season, the lazier I get about exercising. Shouldn’t the opposite happen? I feel like I’ve put in all the effort in the previous months and it’s time to take a break. But then I sit and look at my pouch belly and wonder why I can’t tone it up. I also seem to eat worse on days that I don’t exercise, rather than on the days that I do exercise. Don’t ask me why, there is no rhyme or reason. I’m just seemingly unable to figure out a way to eat healthier on the days I don’t work out, and indulge slightly more on the days I do work out. I’ll have to throw in another vow.
Vow: Only eat pasta and/or pizza on days you work out. I was able to cut out pasta from my diet almost entirely for a while. It never even factored back into the equation until I started babysitting at night, and sometimes the easiest thing to do is either make pasta, or order pizza. And sure, there are healthier things to order from a pizzeria than pizza--like a chicken dish, or a salad with grilled chicken, ideally. But you have got to try this pizza! It’s like the town of Manhasset banded together and said “we shall have the best, most irresistible pizza on the face of this earth.” And I know my pizza. It’s one of, if not my favorite meal of all time. And I realize I sound like I’m blaming the kids a lot for my poor eating habits, and it’s not their fault. They eat what they’re given. It just so happens that I have no will power, and I find myself in situations where fast and easy far outweighs healthy and carb-conscious. Excuses, excuses, I know. Which is why I’m vowing to only indulge, from here on out, on days that I work out. If at all! Eek, an “if at all,” amendment sounds difficult and painful, quite frankly. But beauty is pain, right?
Vow: Avoid drinking alcohol in excess. I have actually done very well with this since December. I went on a big alcohol hiatus in hopes that it, combined with my exercise regiment, would help me lose weight. I only shed a couple of pounds, but I think it is extremely beneficial to get out of that college-aged mindset of turning most occasions into an excuse for binge drinking. And sure, it’s fun to let loose every once in a while and have a few too many, but doing this all too often is not only dangerous and detrimental to your health, it’s the perfect storm for a waste of a next day nursing a killer hangover. Is it just me, or do hangovers get worse and worse the older you get? I think it’s nature’s way of telling us we’re not 21 anymore, time to grow up. Not to mention the fact that adding a couple of glasses of wine to a dinner tab can really hike up a bill, depending on the restaurant. Every once in a while it’s fine, but Jim and I are in the market for saving money, since we’ll have a mortgage to pay very soon, so every penny counts.
Vow: Stop watching Glee. Mr. Schuster skeeves me out so much when he’s clapping his glee kids on from the sidelines. Douche chills. I’ve had enough.
While I realize most of my vows are health and diet related, it boils down to this: Yes, I want to be in shape. Yes, I want to look great on my wedding day. But being healthy and navigating my way through stressful situations without overindulging in sweets and alcohol is very important. I think the transition from a speedy high school metabolism to over-indulgent college student to trying to reign it in and become a responsible adult can be tricky. It is important to remember that being healthy and happy are a part of most wedding vows. So while I want to look good for myself and for my fiancé, I also want to feel good and be healthy so that I can make the most of the time we have together. I know all too well how fleeting time can be, and the most important vow I can take is to be around as long as I can be, and to enjoy my time with the people I love, and to do whatever it takes to make that possible. Glee or no Glee.